What Are You Building?

The 4 Laws of True Personal Growth

Introduction

This letter is inspired by an important conversation I had last week with a few close friends. We had an open hearted strategy meeting discussing some of the challenges we are facing as men in the area of business, relationships, and our overall spiritual well-being. The purpose of the meeting was for iron to sharpen iron and to seek clarity from God on the next steps we need to take in this new season of our lives. Some of our struggles varied but there was one thing we all had in common; we are all in the process of building. This was what I took away from our discussion:

• We haven’t been called to do business, we have been called to build business.

• We haven’t been called to do relationships, we have been called to build in and through relationships.

• We haven’t been called to do church, we have been called to build and establish God’s kingdom.

The difference between doing and building is that doing is rooted in self but building is rooted in serving a greater purpose. Doing keeps you busy but building makes you productive. Personally, I have lived the life of doing to the fullest. Several years ago, the question of “what do you do?” would excite me. I relished the opportunity to express any association I had with things or people of status. I created an identity that might have appealed to many; but it was only a shadow of my true self. But what if people thought to ask me the questions of “who are you?” or “what are you building?”, my response would have been very different. I would have been caught up in the battle of projecting an “accepted” image while suppressing what is truly inside. In recent years things have changed for me, and I say this to encourage you that things can and will change for you too.

With that being said, I am at a point in life now where I have experienced four notable phases of building and I have coined them: “The 4 Laws of True Personal Growth” (so far). These phases are necessary when it comes to building and establishing a life rooted in your true identity.

The 1st Law - Let God Work.

Above anything else, God is concerned about who you are; not what you do. It is unfortunate that the opposite of this is perpetuated in modern day society. The world will tell you that what you do set’s the standard for who you are but who you are should set the standard for what you build. The foundation of a building is the most important part of any structure; it is what distributes the weight of a building to the ground. The irony is that the foundation is not seen and neither is it ever celebrated. Can a building survive without it? Absolutely not! The same thing applies to you, therefore the 1st law of true personal growth comes in the form of letting God build your foundation by transforming your character. This is a never-ending process that requires patience and humility. It took humility to accept that I can’t be good enough on my own; and to accept that I had character flaws such as anger, being manipulative, self-centred and arrogant. What comes with accepting a loving God is the acceptance of his correction. Your character re-development is built on his foundation.

Case Study: The Sermon on The Mount

The idea of doing from a place of being as opposed to being from a place of doing was first introduced by Jesus himself. The Sermon on The Mount consisted of several teachings where Jesus highlighted how we can truly reflect God’s character as opposed to projecting the things we do and create in vain. His specific message was to the religious leaders at the time (the Pharisees) who self determined their value based upon their actions; something that is still so relevant looking at how the majority of people approach their lives. The religious leaders were more concerned about following the Law of Moses (The 10 Commandments) down to a tee. However, Jesus’ purpose was to fulfil the law because only he was worthy of doing so. By doing this, he showed us that a reliance on God is paramount when it comes to the transformation of the desires and motivations of the heart. In simpler terms, what you do doesn’t impress him. However God is good and to be trusted, which is why he offers himself as the stable foundation to which things can be built upon.

“Therefore whoever hears these sayings of Mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man who built his house on the rock.” Matthew 7:24

The 2nd Law - Take That Risk.

Nothing worthwhile can be built without taking risks. For most of your life your comfort zone has been embodied with the appearance of busyness and the absence of productivity. When God begins to change your mindset you will be inclined to focus on building the things that last long after you’re gone. The things you do only provide occupation but the things built upon God’s foundation (The 1st law) provide fulfilment. I believe that we know this but the hard part comes in the form of acting upon what is known. When God calls, more often than not, the actions that are to follow require a pivot. A shift will always be required from you because God’s not conformed to the patterns of this world; but without him people always will be. Change is always necessary because faith is a prerequisite to following God. Therefore launching that new business idea or getting ready to start a family might give you cold feet; but taking the risk to pursue these things certainly won’t leave you in the cold. The purpose attached the pivot is far greater than the stumbling experiences that you might encounter along the way.

The 3rd Law - Magnify the Plan. Minimise Yourself.

One of the most important things you can do for your personal growth is this: make it impersonal. It sounds ironic but when you’re in the business of doing, the person on the end of that need is yourself. However in the business of building, God’s plan is on the end of that need as well as all the people attached to it; including yourself. The plan is and will always be greater than you which is why Jesus told us to “seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” (Matthew 6:33). I have to remind myself of this every time I get the urge to temporarily forego my calling at the cost of my personal desires. Your flesh tells you to do in order to be accepted but God tells you to be in order to build. There is a dangerous inclination people have to magnify themselves and minimise God in the process. Here’s one way to put this into perspective. As far as your personal wants are insignificant to the calling over your life is as far as your life is significant to your calling. Have a look at this fact to highlight my point even further:

The observable Universe — in terms of diameter — is nearly a full 27 orders of magnitude, or a factor of one octillion (1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000) larger than a human being.

This is just a numerical indication of the insignificance of our inflated sense of self importance. But on the flip side, it shows how important just one individual is to the God who created a universe that is one octillion times larger than them. Furthermore, there are people in your life who will not always understand this. They will project onto you what is more important to them because they are unaware of what is important to God in the area of your life. It will take the intentional magnification of God’s plan in your life to minimise the importance of how you are depicted in the eyes of other people.

The 4th Law - Stay Consistent.

Staying consistent can be extremely difficult; especially if you are pivoting or doing something new. The understanding and the implementation of the first three laws will help you to consistently build. However there is a fear that keeps many people away from repetitive discipline and consistency. This is the fear of losing yourself as you maintain an uninspired routine. The common response that most of you have heard is that “discipline outweighs motivation so you don’t need inspiration to stay consistent.” As much as I agree with this statement, I am growing to believe it to be an incomplete truth. The reason being is that if you function on this logic for long enough you will eventually feel a disconnect with your humanity. Building a life as a functioning robot is definitely not in God’s design. So what is? Compassion.

Passion fuels what you do but compassion fuels who you are as a relational being. Compassion is what drives consistency while maintaining your humanity. The difference is that compassion comes from God and it recognises the importance of people. Therefore when God calls you to build he simultaneously transforms your heart in the area of compassion towards your designated area of service. This is what ultimately gives your project an inflated sense of meaning in a healthy way. You care more about the cause when you’re not it’s only beneficiary.

A man’s passion to build a home for himself is incomparable to his compassion to build a home for his family.

Ultimately, you will be responsible for the discipline needed to stay consistent, but God empowers your rhythm by giving you desires that mirror his. Personally, I doubt i’d have maintained the discipline to dedicate my life to building with a cause if I didn’t develop compassion along the way; and I cannot take the credit for that either.

As we conclude, I want you to take these laws away with you and see how they apply to your work and personal life. Personally, I have discovered these to be of most importance; but there is still room for growth.

I hope you enjoyed this. Have a great day!